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Dialogue Facilitation

The Coaching Conversation with Marsha Acker

This past Spring I was asked to be on The Coaching Conversation Podcast with host Salah Elleithy of SparkAgility. As Salah stated himself:

“I had a wonderful conversation with Marsha Acker. Many insights emerged on facilitation, coaching, balancing the being and the doing, self-awareness, listening, dialogic leadership and coaching as a core leadership skill.”

Biggest takeaway: it all starts with self-awareness!

Give it a listen!

Here are a few takeaways from the conversation.

How Can You Tell When a Conversation or the Team is Stuck? 

You might not realize when a conversation is stuck. However, there are several indicators that might hint at this. 

Indicators for a ‘stuck conversation’ include the following. 

Stuckness can be heard  

  • Hearing the same conversation over and over

Stuckness can be felt and seen

  • Drained energy
  • Body language
  • Disengaged team members

I look at the behavior of the team and how the conversation is unfolding. My job as facilitator is to help the team see it themselves; they need to realize they are stuck. 

I love using the metaphor of a mirror. 

I can hold up a mirror to the team for them to see it but the goal is that I want the team to hold the mirror themselves. So that they can notice they are stuck.

In other words, team members need to grow the muscle of seeing their patterns. 

Groundhog Day Conversations: What Are They?

A Groundhog Day conversation is when you find yourself having the same conversation over and over again. You think you have resolved it one day, only to find yourself having the same conversation a week later. . These conversations lead nowhere, go nowhere and accomplish nothing. Yet they happen over and over again.

As soon as you notice this phenomenon, ask yourself: “What part am I playing in these conversations that make them Groundhog Day conversations?”

Whether you are part of a team, or a manager – what skills will you need to go beyond these Groundhog Day conversations with your team members?

This is a life changing conversation to have with a mentor or coach! 

You will need to realize what part you’ve been playing in these conversations as to why they keep happening, and then be willing to work on yourself to improve and change the conversation!

Listen to The Coaching Conversation Podcast for the Full Interview

If you have a few minutes, we encourage you to listen to The Coaching Conversation podcast, not just this episode, but others as well. Put link to the podcast here, also.

There is always room to grow, improve and learn no matter what level of leadership experience you have. 

Having skillful and meaningful conversations is something that can, and needs to be practiced by those in leadership positions. 

Have you ever had Groundhog Day conversations? 

How To Lead with Virtual Team Facilitation

During a recent two-day Virtual Team Facilitation workshop, one of our attendees Lisa created several visuals that demonstrate the activities we present during this 2-day workshop.

Find out what TeamCatapult shared in this Virtual Team Facilitation workshop on Day 1 of this Virtual Facilitation Workshop, here. 

Virtual Team Facilitation 1

The Use of Slack Channels During Virtual Team Facilitation!

Slack is a useful tool for all remote teams. As a facilitator of virtual meetings, Slack can be your go-to tool to get conversations going and to keep them going. 

  • Use a Slack channel for checking in
  • Lean in to listen
  • Hear every voice
  • Check in after breaks 

The Mental Model and Decision Funnel!

When asking questions during a remote meeting, here are some things to keep in mind.

Know in advance what type of decision the team is aiming for:

  • Consensus?
  • Majority?
  • Other?

Once a decision is made, it can be tempting to revisit it.  You might need to remind the team of how and why they reached a decision. This is a good time to consider that the decision-making process needs to be reviewed and revised as well.

Evaluation vs Decision Making in Virtual Team Facilitation

Distinguish between evaluation and decision making.

Tools to Evaluate

  • Dot voting
  • Announce evaluation
  • Use affinity mapping before dot voting

Do not rush through evaluation and remember that silence does not mean agreement!  As the facilitator, you are there for support and to help the team reach agreement, ask questions like:

  • Would anyone like to push back on…?
  • What would you advocate for?
  • Who would follow?
  • Is there another move you’d like to make?

Decide

  • In Mural, evaluate by color coding sticky notes against the criteria of the topic’s issues
  • Consider using a grid sorting template 
  • Use gradients of agreement 

These tools can help uncover what is holding people back and if necessary, generate a revised proposal that addresses concerns. 

Virtual Team Facilitation Tips for Leaders

Here are three additional practical tips for leaders new to virtual team facilitation.

1 Transparency

Be transparent when something isn’t working as it should. Calmly accept and adapt and tell the attendees what is going on.

2 Ask WHO

Do not ask ‘Does anyone’ but instead ask

  • WHO… needs more time?
  • WHO… can push back? 

3 Facilitator Assistant

Have one facilitator watching for participants who might get disconnected. Offer help in Slack or via email, text or whatever alternative means you’ve chosen to communicate. 

More Virtual Team Facilitation Help is Available!

We are grateful for Lisa’s willingness to share these visuals with you, our audience, to provide you with a glimpse into the world of Virtual Team Facilitation

Whether it is you, your leadership team, or your company that needs help with Virtual Team Facilitation, TeamCatapult is able to lend a hand. 

Please contact us today for more information for both private and public Virtual Facilitation Masterclass workshops. 

How To Best Guide Your Team With Virtual Team Facilitation

Leaders, is your team scattered across the nation, or the globe? Are you struggling to keep your team focussed, cohesive and productive? Whether your team is virtual due to the recent coronavirus pandemic or had been a virtual team by-design, facilitating a team remotely is easy in concept, but more challenging in reality. 

Fortunately, TeamCatapult has been in the remote work and remote team facilitation space for a long time! We have experience in this space and have been conducting Virtual Team Facilitation workshops for years. 

While attending a recent workshop, attendee Lisa from Get The Picture created this incredible resource for virtual team leaders. This is what was discussed and learned on Day1.  At first blush, it’s probably hard to land on a starting point.  We’ve outlined some salient points that touch on the flow of the workshop.

virtual team facilitation 2

Getting Started With Virtual Team Facilitation

The first thing to do when facilitating a virtual team meeting is to reduce distractions.  We recommend that attendees do one or all of these: 

  • Silence their phone
  • Shut the door
  • Close their email tab

While your team members take care of these things on their end, you as the facilitator should take care of some business as well! 

Tips for the Virtual Team Facilitator

1 Display a Welcome Screen

This assures everyone has come to the right place. This also makes everyone feel welcome.

2 Use a Slack channel for Parking Lot 

Be sure to clear it out by the end of the day! If you are unfamiliar with this term, the ‘Parking Lot’ is where you post follow up questions and discussions that might lead you on a path away from what you are teaching at the moment. 

Noting the responses and answers about any of the items and ‘clearing’ them at the end of the day validates the importance of questions without cutting into the formal workshop time.

3 Use a Virtual Circle in Mural to Open 

You can use photos of attendees, and invite people to ‘sit next to someone’. Once everyone is seated in the circle (virtual) take time for everyone to introduce themselves.  Again, this helps new attendees feel welcome and wanted.

4 Use Breakout Rooms in Zoom 

Ask people to reach you in Slack if you are needed during the breakout session. Zoom breakout rooms are a great way to have small group discussions among attendees.  We use these rooms so teams can work on simulations while capturing notes in Mural.

Timezones, Technology and Ground Rules

There are things that can go wrong when using technology, from the challenge of varying time zones, to not being able to connect, to having unstable Wifi. Expect these issues, but be sure to set ground rules!

Set and Scribe Ground Rules

  • Be in a quiet place
  • Be off mute
  • Be on video
  • Be on time
  • Pay attention

Ask: ‘What do you need of me?’ and ‘What do you need of each other?’

Include ways to handle collisions. For example – be clear how you will handle two people speaking at once. It does happen so have a plan in place from the beginning.

Low Stakes Virtual Team Facilitation

Often times meetings can get into a “high-stakes” atmosphere, where there are, simply put, conflicts within the team on an issue.  The question for a facilitator is how will you slow things down and make it feel low stakes and safe to continue on with the conflict? 

Here are three solutions:

  1. Narrate
  2. Chunk instructions
  3. Normalize

Use Question Prompts to Incite Curiosity

Get people outside of their normal ways of thinking about their work! Using question prompts gets attendees to open up and participate and move beyond what’s may have them stuck on how to talk about and resolve a topic.

Virtual Team Facilitation Design Tips!

Here are 3 design tips that might help you organize your next virtual meeting. 

  • Resist the urge to jump to tools
  • Test… is a meeting actually needed?
  • Use offline time to do work!

Learn More About Virtual Team Facilitation!

To find out more about Virtual Team Facilitation, check out what Lisa learned on Day 2 of the Virtual Team Facilitation Workshop!

We are grateful for Lisa’s willingness to share these visuals with you, our audience, to provide you with a glimpse into the world of Virtual Team Facilitation

Whether it is you, your leadership team, or your company that needs help with Virtual Team Facilitation, TeamCatapult is able to lend a hand.

Please contact us today for more information for both private and public Virtual Facilitation Masterclass workshops.

 

Five Guiding Principles of an Agile Team Facilitation Stance

Collaboration Is a Core Value In Agile

Regardless of the agile framework(s) you use, agile practices require some level of collaboration within teams or between teams, customers and stakeholders.

Collaboration is two or more people coming together to co-create something. When collaboration is effective it can have a euphoric feeling of accomplishment, success, trust, and teamwork. When collaboration is ineffective it can drain a team – that feeling that you get of ‘here we go again…same discussion, same outcome, just a different day’. Effective or ineffective, collaboration is messy – you can’t predict how it will go, things don’t always unfold the way you might think they will, and it’s always emergent.

Facilitation is a core competency for Agile Coaches – teams need facilitators who can foster effective collaboration, support meaningful dialogues and enable team decision-making.

In this introduction to developing guiding principles, we’ll identify and offer guidance regarding four of the most common traits that can subtly surface and begin to erode a team’s efficacy. Implementing core values needs to involve team members and the organization’s values alike.

First, here are some common challenges that can get in the way of effective collaboration in agile teams.

  • Asking for input when you’ve already made up your mind about what the decision or outcome will be
  • Using your positional authority of leading a meeting to drive your own agenda and influence a particular outcome
  • An unclear purpose and/or desired outcome for the collaboration
  • The team is unclear about how the final decision will be made (i.e. Is the group making a recommendation or a final decision? Will majority rule or will we strive for consensus?)

How We Think Is How We Lead

Learning facilitation tools and techniques are really useful but if what you believe is different from what you’re doing, well, the tools won’t really matter. Collaboration will be frustrating and less impactful than you might desire. In essence, we are searching for the values of a good facilitator.

It Begins With You

Facilitation is like a complex dance of polarities. When teams come together to collaborate, rarely are topics or decisions black and white with a clear ‘right’ answer. At any given time when you are leading a group from a facilitative stance, you’re interweaving different ideas and perspectives together, creating a rich and textured network of ideas that serve to deepen understanding and seek diversity. You’re helping the group define the shades of gray so that they can make more informed decisions.

You Are Managing Yourself


It takes a high degree of self-awareness, self-management and group awareness to navigate the dance. People are putting their trust in you to lead them through a complex process; to be heard, to be respected, to be valued and to contribute to something greater than what they could accomplish on their own.

Facilitators, you’ll prepare for this kind of work by starting with what you believe. In other words, create guiding principles for leading community members and teams.

How We Think Informs How We Act

The Five Guiding Principles


The five guiding principles of The Agile Team Facilitation Stance form the foundation upon what we believe about groups and teams and how those beliefs might show up in the room. Creating guiding principles for your team facilitation work will prepare you as you facilitate!

Facilitation Stance

1) Maintain Neutrality

At the highest level, this principle is about you owning the process, and the team owning the content.
In practice, this looks like bridging competing ideas, sharing what you see in the process with facts, and without judgment.

Review the following tables for each guiding principle and see what each one can look like in action

Internal Assumptions and Beliefs

  • I am active and engaged (not passive)
  • I own the process, they own the content
  • I add value by reflecting back to the group what’s actually happening
  • I am open minded and see value in all voices
  • Polarities in opinions offer opportunities to find common ground
  • I am vested in helping the group achieve their desired outcomes
  • Critique about the group process is not a critique about who I am

Practices

  • Say what you see, in a factual, non-judgmental way
  • Let go of judging right vs wrong
  • Take a systems perspective
  • Bridge competing ideas
  • Listen for the 2% common ground
  • Offer ideas with no attachment to the outcome
  • Inquire by asking powerful questions
  • Seek to understand and deepen the group’s understanding

2) Stand in the Storm

The term “storm” can look, feel and behave differently in each team. This is about seeking out and really listening to differing stances, perspectives, options, solutions, and paths. Without taking sides, a facilitator holds the space for all to speak and be heard during a meeting.

Internal Assumptions and Beliefs

  • Storms create deeper understanding and context for what’s being discussed
  • I don’t need to take sides; I need to be able to help the group hear all perspectives
  • Opposition offers correction
  • The purpose of conflict is to be helpful to a process
  • Dysfunctional behavior is a sign of displeasure with something that is happening or something that is wanting to happen, more often than it is about what it looks like in the moment (i.e., interpersonal conflict)
  • I don’t need to have the answers; I need to help the group find the solution

Practices 

  • Create the container that allows for storms
  • Sense when there is dissonance – either overt or covert
  • Have empathy with each member of the group
  • Inquire about opposition
  • Be fully present
  • Be self-aware of your own personal bias
  • Adjust the process if the conflict calls for it
  • Activate bystanders  – voice what you are seeing or hearing
  • Turn it back to the group to decide 

3) Hold the Group’s Agenda

By continually asking, “How can I best serve this group?” or “What does this group really need right now?” you’ll be operating within this principle. At times, a feeling of resistance, or an instinct to shut down may arise. Perhaps you receive feedback about the process and you feel the beginnings of defensive feelings.  The best tool to meet that feeling with is curiosity and a focus on holding the group’s agenda.

Internal Assumptions and Beliefs

  • This is their Agenda (Big ‘A’ agenda – the underlying need; not little ‘a’ agenda of a meeting)
  • Resistance is not dysfunctional; it’s trying to be helpful
  • Inability to converge or decide may mean there is something that needs to be discussed that has not been discussed 

Practices

  • Always be asking ‘How can I best serve this group?’
  • Treating all actions by the group as data about what they really need
  • Meeting resistance with curiosity
  • Aware of the difference between the facilitators desire and what the group needs
  • Creating a space that allows for opposition to both process and content
  • Owning the process and being open to feedback about the process 

4) Honor the Wisdom of the Group

Related to Stand in the Storm, mentioned earlier, this principle, at its core is about trust. Trusting that the group has it’s own wisdom and developing an environment where each member of the team can grow, stretch and achieve as a respected and valued collaborator. Everyone on the team has both wisdom to learn and wisdom to share.

Internal Assumptions and Beliefs

  • Trust in the collective intelligence, capacity, and experience of the group
  • People are more committed to what they have helped to create
  • The whole is greater than the sum of its parts
  • Diversity and difference enhance the outcome
  • Inclusiveness and engagement of all is needed
  • An environment of trust will lead to participation by all
  • The group already has all it needs, my job is to help them access that knowledge 

Practices

  • Create a container that fosters trust, connection, and inclusiveness
  • Design group processes that engage the whole group
  • Make it safe for all voices
  • Ask for the opposing voice
  • Find the thread that leads to consensus, and help the group pull it through 

5) Uphold the Agile Mindset

In practice, this principle can be agility itself: mindset, methods, and actions. There’s a foundational belief that a facilitator can help the team adapt the agile practices in the moment while still upholding the agile values and principles. Best accomplished by modeling agile values and maintaining a servant leadership stance.

Internal Assumptions and Beliefs

  • I honor the values and principles of the agile mindset, and use it to inform group processes, both planned and in the moment
  • I hold the agile mindset, lightly, so that the way the group holds the mindset can be prominent
  • I understand the agile practices well enough to support the team
  • I can adapt the agile practices in the moment while still upholding the agile values

Practices

  • Model agile practices
  • Adapt the practices based on the performance, maturity, and needs of the team
  • Embrace a lean/agile mindset
  • Lead with servant leadership

Five Guiding Principles In Action

These are, on the surface, simple principles. You’ve likely noticed in the sections of internal assumptions and practices that it can get complex quickly. Each guiding principle offers its own complex, rich lessons and dynamics. In future posts, we’ll take deeper dives into these complexities with specific examples of each principle in action. We’ll show what they are in action…and what they aren’t too.

For now, which of these principles feels like a mindset that you already hold – it comes naturally for you?

Which principle feels more like a stretch?

What’s one belief you might “try on” in an upcoming meeting?

What actions would you take that might be different from what you have done in the past?

Do you want to learn how to facilitate guiding principles?

How Leaders Engage: Learning to Be an Agile Leader

Showing Up Is Important. Engaging Is Paramount

In “How Leaders Show Up: Learning to Be an Agile leader” we learned that research consistently and clearly demonstrates that team effectiveness is highly dependent upon the quality of communication between team members. 

The quality of communication is how we explain why some teams are high performing and others struggle. It’s how we explain why some organizations are successful at large organizational changes and others are not. And it’s how we explain why we might have very engaging and productive conversations with some people and end up in complete frustration with others.

In our work with leadership teams, what we often see is that leaders spend a great deal of time focused on the “what” in their business:

  • What’s the target for next quarter? 
  • What’s our revenue? 
  • What are we doing to innovate and transform? 
  • What’s our roadmap? 
  • What metrics will we use to show progress? 

However, leaders spend very little—if any—time looking at how they engage. 

Conversations are the foundation for all of our interactions. But there is a structure to how conversations unfold—to how we engage—that determines how well we perform. Just like the structure of a riverbed determines the flow of water in a stream, the structure of a conversation determines performance. 

Structuring Conversations To Improve Engagement

At TeamCatapult, we’ve found that when we introduce engagement from a structural perspective, leadership teams are able to start seeing things much more clearly:

  • How they are getting in their own way 
  • Where their espoused values and beliefs create dissonance with their actions
  • Where they are having more meaningful and productive conversations to solve the more complex and adaptive challenges in their organization

When we can see and name the structure of conversations in a non-biased way, it’s easier to see where the structure is either enabling or getting in the way of a positive, productive outcome, and it’s easier to feel at choice in our interactions.

Structural Dynamics To Improve Conversations

The theory of “structural dynamics” was developed by David Kantor in the early 1970s. It emerged from his work in family systems therapy but was extrapolated in the 1980s to characterize interaction in any system, including the relationships that exist in organizations. 

4 Kinds Of Action for Effective Interactions

In structural dynamics, there are 4 kinds of action that need to be taken in every conversation in order for the interaction to be effective. 

The 4 action competencies are:

  1. Move: this is when someone initiates an idea. It sets the direction in a conversation. 
  2. Follow: this action continues the direction of the conversation, supporting what is happening an/or offering clarification. 
  3. Oppose: this action challenges or disagrees, and offers an alternate perspective.
  4. Bystand: with this action, someone notices and names what’s happening in the conversation in a morally neutral way. The bystand action often bridges competing ideas. 

For a conversation to unfold in an effective and meaningful way, someone in the room needs to vocally bring each and every one of these actions into the conversation.

Field of Conversations

Everything we want and desire from business agility stems from our ability to have conversations that explore ideas, perceptions, and understanding. From our ability to surface together what people do not already have on their own. 

“We call this type of conversation a dialogue.”

A dialogue is when you explore the uncertainties and questions that no one has answers to. It’s where you think together, using the energy of differences to enhance the collective wisdom.

People often use the terms “discussion,” “conversation,” and “dialogue” interchangeably to mean the same or similar things. In reality, however, they are each quite different and result in very different outcomes. 

From Monologue to Dialogue: Making a Choice

Most teams would self-identify as having lots of dialogue, but when you observe them for a little while you often find that they tend to spend most of their time in monologue. You hear one person dominate, or you hear two people locked in debate with two opposing views. In fact, very few teams are able to have skillful conversations or dialogue without some prompting and some intentional and thoughtful awareness. 

Because our conversations are where we make meaning and sense of what’s happening in our organizations, it is critical to build that intentional and thoughtful awareness. This begins with understanding the basic fields of conversation. If we want to move forward more productively, we need to know where we are. 

The “fields of conversation” is a framework developed by MIT lecturer Otto Scharmer in his observations of groups in conversation. It describes four different fields that we move in and out of when we are interacting in a group. 

  1. “Courteous Compliance”
    In this first field of conversation, we are downloading. In a new group, this is where people are figuring out what’s acceptable and not acceptable. In a more established group or team, this is where people are following the rules, and the conversation often stays on the surface. It is a polite field of conversation where the main action competencies of Move and Follow predominate.
  2. “Breakdown”
    If you stay in the conversation long enough, you will reach this second field of conversation. This is where debate occurs. The action competencies of Move and Oppose are most common in this field. Unconsciously, groups in this field of conversation will make an important choice: they will either stay with the Oppose and make space for it to be voiced, or they will silence the Oppose and go back to a state of courteous compliance. 
  3. “Thinking Together”
    For groups that stay with the often uncomfortable feeling of the Oppose action taken in the “breakdown” field of conversation, the reward is that they get the opportunity to “think together.” No longer focused on rehashing the past or holding tightly to views and opinions, this is the space where genuine curiosity enters. One does not have to agree with another’s point of view in order to inquire and be curious about it. As curiosity flourishes in this field of conversation, the group begins to focus on creating the future.
  4. “Generative Dialogue”On rare occasions, we might push beyond “thinking together” and enter the “generative dialogue” field of conversation. This is the true space of innovation, where we are no longer holding onto our own opinion but are creating new ideas together. Generative in nature, the action competencies we see in this field of conversation are Move, Follow, Oppose, and Bystand. Each action competency is active and voiced within the group.“What you resist persists.” -Carl Jung

How We Do Anything is How We Do Everything. 

When we never leave politeness or debate fields of conversation, we just keep reenacting the past. We get stuck in our current beliefs and thinking. We do this for many reasons. Maybe we have leftover beliefs from how we have seen our mentors lead. Or there is leadership culture in the organization that says, “Let’s not have any surprises,” so everyone makes up their mind on discussion points before they arrive to a meeting. The trap in this thinking is twofold: it assumes that we already know everything we need to know, and it assumes that the decision point requires a technical solution. 

There is risk and vulnerability to showing up and being in dialogue with others. It requires letting go of “knowing” the answers and the desire to have it all figured out. It also requires that we make space for opposition. Rather than viewing the Oppose action as something to be feared, we need to view it as necessary. Without opposition, we will remain stuck where we are. 

And when we gain a new level of understanding, when we learn, and when our beliefs and mindsets shift, we achieve real change.

We Become Agile

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Recent Posts

  • Why We Need to Invest in Behavior Change – Not of Another Tool
  • Why Thinking you Need to Have All the Answers is Counterproductive for your Team
  • How to Welcome Disagreement Within Your Team (and mean it)
  • How to Welcome Team Opposition from a Space of Confidence and Curiosity
  • Why a Difference of Opinion Makes Your Team Much More Effective

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